Have you ever been referred to as a “girl’s girl”? In today’s pop culture, this label has become the ultimate compliment. But what does it really mean to be a girl’s girl? It involves being there for your friends, providing support in various situations, and maintaining honesty and compassion. It’s all about being a reliable friend, especially within a predominantly heterosexual society.
The term “girl’s girl” has gained tremendous traction on TikTok with over 646 million views, and it’s not just confined to the digital world. Celebrities and those associated with them have also embraced this term. But what does it truly signify, and does it actually matter if someone doesn’t fit the girl’s girl stereotype?
In a recent cover story for Variety, Ice Spice spoke about how many individuals in the music industry claim to be girl’s girls when in reality, they engage in divisive behavior behind the scenes, fostering competition rather than genuine support. This reveals the complexity and challenges of this perceived solidarity.
Consider the instance when Maya Benberry, the former partner of footballer Travis Kelce, warned Taylor Swift about Kelce’s fidelity. While offering her best wishes to Swift, Benberry felt it was her duty as a girl’s girl to advise Swift on making smart choices. Similarly, the term ‘girl’s girl’ has been used to scrutinize celebrities like Ariana Grande, creating disproportionate blame and scrutiny, often undermining the men involved in such scenarios. This has led to a heated debate on the glorification of the girl’s girl concept, which, in some cases, inadvertently supports a patriarchal narrative.
The modern concept of a girl’s girl brings with it a fair share of pressure and judgment. Historically, women have been positioned to compete against one another, leading to a biased portrayal of femininity in popular culture. The early 2000s promoted a “cool girl” image, while today, there’s a surge in celebrating feminine solidarity and friendships.
Yet, as the idea of girl’s girl gains popularity and influence, it’s employed to shame women for not conforming to an often unrealistic standard. This trend is used as a tool for critiquing and isolating women who don’t fit the predefined mold of a supportive woman or who express their confidence differently from the norm. This puts undue pressure on women, reinforcing a pattern of misogyny.
There’s a palpable impact of internalized misogyny within the trend as well. The pressure to conform to the girl’s girl narrative creates a sense of obligation and a burden to reciprocate, leading to unfair blame and unrealistic expectations.
Instead of placing the concept of a girl’s girl on a moral pedestal or completely discrediting it, we should view it with nuance. It’s important to recognize the multifaceted nature of women’s behavior and to avoid pitting them against one another.
Ultimately, the trend should be seen as a fleeting expression of solidarity and support, not as a rigid rulebook dictating how women should behave. It’s crucial to embrace diversity and individuality, allowing women the freedom to define and express themselves authentically, beyond the constraints of social media standards.
